Ubuntu Linux has been confirmed to be an Alien plot to destroy the Human race. In the 43-page plan leaked by an Unnamed Ubuntu user, the aliens plan to subvert our computer systems by sending out loads of inferior operating systems for free. "This software can either have a severe addictive and zealot effect, or extreme discomfort and annoyance," quoted Professor of Psychology at Harvard University.
The leak highlights a plan to supply Earth oil in exchange for a puppet government, and to eventually destroy the atmosphere so the human race slowly dies. Several refereces to nuculer warfare and a typical demolition of the planet were made within the article.
This all brings a new meaning to "Linux for human beings," as their slogan.
Ubuntu Developers and Community Leaders failed to comment on the issue with anything other than "we will assimilate, we are GNU."
Computer Psychiatry Therapist, Jean Wolcome reported on the cases on the Doom III incidents of severe truma. She commented to our reporters that due to this Opeating System, the health system has 20% more patients a week for severe truama and computer stress. "I don't know how the system will cope with the growing rise of such crappy software," said a psychiatric nurse sobbing tears, who suffers long term Post Traumatic Stress Disorder as a result of Windows ME.
Software Satisfaction Laws lobby groups continue to protest the Government's lack of action dealing with the Alien Race. In fact hints on negotiations existed inside the leak with the governments itself.