Stop Microsoft
All Things Microsoft => Microsoft Software => Topic started by: SAJChurchey on 4 January 2003, 19:06
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The IT Dept. where I go to school at are a bunch of idiots. They run WinXP on their servers and don't know a thing about Linux. I asked them about putting a Linux machine on the network and this is what they told me:
"You'll have to secure it and get anti-virus software for it"
I laughed my ass off. :rolleyes:
I work a computer lab w/ about 30 iMacs and a bunch of Gateway computers running XP Pro. That Gateway lab is down most of the time because they're "reinstalling." It appears that everytime something goes wrong they reinstall XP. So I decided to play a little trick on them:
When I was closing on enight, I did the classic Print Screen followed by setting it as the wall paper, getting rid of the icons and dragging the task bar down . . . You click all over the place, and nothing happens.
I come into work the next evening, and my supervisor has already called the IT people over to have a look at the computer that was "acting up." I gave them a little more credit and gave them about 5 min. to solve the little dilema.
10 minutes later...after clicking all over the place and nothing happening....
:confused: "I'll have to reinstall."
:eek:
They never once tried to reboot or even hit the Start button on the keyboard. I was amazed...
Please tell me there are more competent all-windows IT depts. out there. Give me a little hope for society...please (http://smile.gif)
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Nope, that's as good as they get...
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that is sooo sad :(
stupid people.
i almost feel bad
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quote:
Originally posted by void main:
Nope, that's as good as they get...
Really..
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This just goes to show you how incompetent some IT depts. are. There are many stories around here about them screwing things up. Once I get my CCNA I might go in and show them how it's done.
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Kind of related, I was helping a buddy reinstall (lol) Windows on his pc and it wouldn't install properly "kernel32.dll (or whatever it is) general protection fault" and it would not finish. After remembering a coworker mention bios antivirus caused a similar problem for him, I called our Hurt, I mean Help Desk and asked them if turning it off was something specific and common or if it varied, and the girl, who I have helped with applications (Word, Frontpage, etc) in our labs where I work, and can't believe works at the help desk, didn't know anything about bios antivirus protection and no one including the supervisor on shift at the time did either. I figured it out but I just laughed that they had never even heard of it, and of course the point is they told me "We recommend doing a reinstall" *sigh*
kinda lengthy but who cares (http://smile.gif)
Dj
[ January 08, 2003: Message edited by: Engineer ]
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thats as bad as the it department at my school,
and the term is helldesk
[ January 08, 2003: Message edited by: choasforages ]
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Any other incompetent IT stories? Please post. I'll post another one later. I want to hear the forum's stories.
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quote:
Originally posted by fett101:
Really..
I'm sorry, you must work on a help desk.
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people who work on a helpdesk need help.
maybe that's why they take the job in the first place?
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quote:
Originally posted by void main:
I'm sorry, you must work on a help desk.
Nope.
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It's amazing how little people know about BIOS and command line anymore. If it doesn't use a mouse and pointer, they don't know how to use this. CLI was b4 my time, I'm only 18, and I know DOS and *nix better than most of the IT Pros I've encountered. I think it's pathetic.
Windows has crippled the IT competency of this nation.
Help desks are never helpful. They read out of a manual basically and have no idea how to get really dirty when it comes with messing with computers.
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It doesn't matter what the problem is when it comes to Windoze, the remedy is always the same. Re boot first, if that fails, re install.
I had a user call Dell's "award winning" support about a Windoze problem with M$ Word. Can you guess what their solution to the problem was ? Yup, re install Windoze (after already reinstalling Word) "that ought to do it" the helpdesk person cheerfully informed the user. WTF ?!!
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Any idiot can fix windows like that. I mean it's not like we have anything important on our HDs or anything, and it's not like I don't enjoy wasting tons of time and CDs backing up my files and reinstalling everytime windows fucks up "beyond repair," which is quite frequently.
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I thought we had some windows tech support guy visit here who said reinstalling was usually the given answer because it easier for idiots to do then some of the real solutions.
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Well the IT person should be the one fixing the problems. not the end user. What's the purpose of an IT dept. that does nothing but tell the end user to reinstall. It kind of defeats the purpose.
[ January 09, 2003: Message edited by: SAJChurchey ]
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Like a mechanic telling you your transmission is bad and the only way to fix it is for you to put in a new one, then charging you for it, like you don't already know something is really wrong hahahaha
Dj
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Here's something for you Mac lovers out there. This is why IT is forbidden to touch any Macs on campus:
The yearbook needed to downgrade to OS 9.2 for some reason (I think OS X had issues w/ their printer or something). The yearbook president discusses this with them to see if it is doable, and in no way did he say "come in and do this ASAP." He was just thinking about it.
When he comes in the next day, OS X boots up normally, but all of the files are gone. All the pictures for this year are gone.
They reinstalled OS X trying to get the printer to work the second time 'round, and they didn't back up any data on the HD. All the pictures that cannot be replaced were lost b/c they're not used to having data on a computer at any given time.
Since then IT is not allowed to touch any Mac on campus. A MacUser student organization runs a help desk for it instead.
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That is pretty stupid and they shouldn't be allowed to touch *any* machines, not just the Macs, because the results would be the same. However, you are playing with fire by not having them backed up in the first place or keep these important images on a server that is backed up. What if your hard drive zaps, or there is a fire, or the computer is stolen or vandalized?
[ January 09, 2003: Message edited by: void main ]
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Attention to detail (or common sense for that matter) is obviously not a concern anymore.
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quote:
Originally posted by void main:
That is pretty stupid and they shouldn't be allowed to touch *any* machines
Damn. You beat me to it.
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heh. that sounds like the iMacs in the lab I watched over fall of 01 semester.
Our IT director at Destitute State... er, I mean Arkansas State is a cross-platform guy, but everyone else there is an idiot.
Okay, there's an issue that I'm having getting the iMacs to connect to the outside world. Namely, the school's DHCP server is a turd, along with their shiteater routers. So, I call the IT morons and ask 'em what they did to their server today, and the guy kinda mumbled and said he needed to come "do some stuff" on the iMacs.
So, just to fuck with him, I restarted all of 'em to OS X (this was sucky ass 10.0, BTW and it was still better than what they had). For the life of me, I don't know how, but that solved the problem. All of the software we needed was running fine in Classic, so I decided to leave 'em in X. I was getting the 10.1 update that weekend, so, I'd fix 'em all up then!
Okay. The guy never shows up, and he doesn't come by until late Monday, after all of 'em had 10.1 installed on 'em. He comes in, sits down at one, and pulls out an OS 8.5 CD (which won't even install on these things... they require 9.1 or higher!) I immediately ask him what he's doing... "reinstalling".
So, after ten minutes of so, of me rolling on the floor laughing at his stupidity, I told him to leave because they worked fine now. He looked stunned and left.
Windroids are dumb.
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somebody was telling me on another forum that these windoids only go crawling up microsoft's ass because they don't know of things like linux et c, he said it's not fair to call people stupid when they don't know any better, but stories like this make me think that, yes, they really are just stupid fucktards!
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Nice stories you people got there.
Although it isn't his official job my dad is IT Manager at the small company he works, thank god he has experience with Linux, DOS and Windows(and probably Unix, if that is the stuff they learned the tech service of the army in Yugoslavia to use) or that company would be doomed.
He spent a day removing a trojan from the network(well, not really, he was also trying to find out how it worked and he trojaned our home network too to play around, so now my dad is an official script kidde :D )
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A guy (Adam)i know works for a web design company but provides tech support over the phone. One phone call on Monday morning goes like this:
Caller (end user): My monitor is dead, the computer is not working, i move the mouse nothing happens.
Adam: Okay, is there a light on the pc case.
Caller: Whats the pc case? This doesn't have one.
Adam: Okay, is this a Mac because normally only macs don't have cases?
Caller: No this isn't a Mac.
Adam: Okay well there should be a "metallic box" with a couple of buttons.
Caller: Nope, i havn't got one.
Adam: Is it under the desk?
Caller: O Wait, i see this box with some buttons on it.
Adam: Push the button.
Caller: O its working now!
What happened was it was a new week and after she had left on the Friday afternoon the IT people had turned the computer off, must of been the first time they had EVER turned it off because she had never had this problem before. She also never realised what was underneath her desk all this time either.
[ January 10, 2003: Message edited by: Crunchy(Cracked)Butter ]
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one of our engineers here at work had an embarrasing moment last week.
i got a call from the big head of our dept, asking if i could locate a particular PC (all the incoming and outgoing new and old PCs come through our office) and this particular one was an old PC being replaced with a new one by this engineer. Anyway, i looked for the paperwork and i found the paperwork to show that the new PC had been collected for installation by the engineer something like 3 weeks before, but could not find any record that the engineer had brought the old PC back to us.
Well about three hours later after the whole place and a few other offices had all been searching their records, the engineers had been riffling through their paperwork and so on, the engineer concerned finally went upstairs to the user's desk. He said "you know that PC i replaced a few weeks ago?... I took it away didn't i?" and she said "No, it's here under my desk." and it had been for three weeks before anybody thought to chase it up!
Perhaps we could find a lot of our old IT equipment this way. also, i wanted to point out that sometimes it's not the users who make the mistakes!
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End users are idiots a lot of the time. That's why they need good IT depts. to make up for a moronic work force. We're the ones who control and understand the technology behind business. We are the shepards and they're the flocks.
But if the IT dept. doesn't know shit, and the end user is assumed to know absolutely nothing. Your business is just not living up to it's potential.
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the it directors at my school seem to think that linux is a toy os. when i asked them about putting linux on 1 or 2 pcs in each lab they wer e like 'you can play around and have fun with linux etc at home'. ok now i told them very seriously that they need to re-evaluate their definitions of serious os's and toy os's. then i started walking away and thought about it again, and soon i needed oxygen i was laughing so hard
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I feel sorry for those tech support guys after reading this crap. (http://rinkworks.com/stupid/)
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From the link provided above:
# Customer: "I installed Windows 98 on my computer, and it doesn't work."
# Tech Support: "Ok, what happens when you turn on your computer?"
# Customer: "Boy, are you listening? I said it doesn't work."
# Tech Support: "Well, what happens when you TRY to turn it on?"
# Customer: "Look, I'm not a computer person. Talk regular English, not this computer talk, ok?"
# Tech Support: "Ok, let's assume your computer is turned off, and you just sat down in front of it, and want to use it. What do you do?"
# Customer: "Don't talk like I'm stupid, boy. I turn it on."
# Tech Support: "And then what happens?"
# Customer: "What do you mean?"
# Tech Support: "Does anything appear on your monitor? I mean, the TV part."
# Customer: "The same thing I saw last time I tried."
# Tech Support: "And that is what?"
# Customer: "Are you sure you know what you're doing?"
# Tech Support: "Yes, sir. What is on your screen?"
# Customer: "A bunch of little pictures."
# Tech Support: "Ok, in the upper left corner, do you see 'My Computer'."
# Customer: "No, all I see is that little red circle thing with the chunk out of it."
# Tech Support: "You mean an apple?"
# Customer: "I guess it kind of looks like an apple."
HAHAHAHAHAHAHHA
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def, system administartor
anybody that can read the BOFH and at first think they are reading email from a fellow admin
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my school is, should i say has about 60 Mac's 4 Majour Linux servers, with about 20 linux boxes), and about 500 winblows pc's.
Well anyway, when u go and use a mac, 1 never, never see a busted mac.
When i look at linux, no problems.
But when i look at winblowz i see out of order, mouse not working, and a load of crap.
The it techs are kn***. They though was uploading a virus to there comps, but what i was doing was making a pop up program in notpad.
Then what pisssed me of is, they had screen shots of me doing it, which proved my inocence, but did they show erm to dep head no!!!
So anyway i got banned from the comps for 2 months for that.
And got pissed of with them that one night after school i found out the it techs password, and changed all longin numbers with the windows Nt trojan!
And it took erm ages to figure it out, but by then i had created a hidden admin account,a nd still use it today (after to months) so it proves how crap windows is!!
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The school system that I went to HS in ran all Windows 98...How secure is that?
They tried to lay this crap on me for "computer trespass" because I was browsing the shared crap on the network and found social security numbers and personal pictures of the administrators and stuff. It's not my fault they fully shared their entire hard drives, and that every folder on every computer was accesible to me. I didn't "trespass" on anything. It's not like I was searching for "hidden" files or anything.
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fett that is a hilarious link. im hooked.
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that link is excellent!
quote:
* Customer: "YOU GAVE ME A VIRUS!"
* Tech Support: "I don't think I've got a virus."
* Customer: "Go download [a brand of virus checker], and you'll see."
Sometime later I dutifully ran the checker.
* Tech Support: "Ok, I ran it. No virus."
* Customer: "You MUST have a virus. You gave it to me. It was all over my system. You must not have run the checker properly." (yell, rant, rave, repeat checks, etc)
* Tech Support: "How did I give it to you?"
* Customer: "On those floppies with the latest revision of the software you wrote."
* Tech Support: "The ones you just returned?"
* Customer: "Yeah."
* Tech Support: "Just a sec...let me check those." (pause) "Well, I found a virus on the disks. Ahem...seems you were about to pass a virus on to ME."
* Customer: "Ah...lemme get back to you." (click)
And for those guys who got bullied by their schools, if you can see a file, you have the right to in my opinion. if somebody wants to protect data, they should protect it and not waste their time shouting about how rude it is of people to view it. stands to reason. shouting's a waste of time if they haven't even secured their data.
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Two girls walked into the University's Linux cluster one time. They were obviously unfamiliar with computers and chatted with each other trying to figure everything out. I was doing my own work and had tuned out a lot of the conversation, but at one point one of them turned to me and asked how to get into Windows. "Type startx," I replied, for the Linux machines booted to a shell prompt, and you had to type "startx" to get into X-Windows. I never did find out if that worked for them or not, but they spent quite some time trying to correlate the instructions they had on paper (presumably given out in one of their classes) with what they were seeing on the screen. A full hour and a half passed, and finally one of them turned to me again and asked if this was the Microsoft Windows cluster. "No," I replied, "that's downstairs." It was hard to stifle the laughter until they were gone. An hour and a half before they realized they weren't even using the right operating system. Wow.
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The place where a friend of mine works was going through the process of upgrading all of their computers. On one computer in particular, they had determined they needed more memory. One of the senior partners got it into her head that they needed more "Meg." My friend tried to tell her that what they needed was RAM, but she insisted that the machine had plenty of RAM and that they needed more Meg -- specifically, about 16 megabytes of Meg. He got tired of arguing with her and said to go down to the computer store and buy some Meg.
She came back with an envelope with RAM in it -- on the envelope was written "16 megabytes of Meg."
"The salesman tried to tell me the same thing you did," she told my friend, "but then he went and talked to his manager, and he set him straight. Now go install this Meg."
that site really is fantastic! :D
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# Customer: "I need to print out my letter here."
# Me: "Ok, what program did you use to create it?"
# Customer: "Macintosh!"
# Me: "No, what actual program did you use. Was it MacWrite? Claris?"
# Customer: "Microsoft."
# Me: "OK, you used Microsoft Word. We have that here, so go ahead and sit down at one of these Macs."
# Customer: "It wasn't Microsoft Word. It was Windows!"
# Me: "I need to know what kind of computer you used. Was it a Macintosh or an IBM?"
# Customer: "I don't think it was an IBM."
# Me: "It could be an IBM compatible. Do you remember anything about what kind of computer it was?"
# Customer: "Microsoft!"
# Me: "Did the computer have a little apple on the front of it?"
# Customer: "I think so."
# Me: (What I should have done five minutes ago...) "Give me the disk, and I'll put it in my computer and check it out."
i'm sorry i keep quoting but some of these are hilarious!
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* Me: "So what do you think of the Y2K problem?"
* My Coach: "The what?"
* Me: "The Y-2-K problem. What do you think about it?"
* My Coach: "What is Y2K?"
* Me: "Y2K, you know, the year 2000 problem?"
* My Coach: "Oh yeah, I know something about that."
* Me: "So do you think that this is going to be a big problem?"
* My Coach: "Of course not! If Bill Gates can write Windows 98 all by himself, then he's going to be able to fix the problem on time."
oh my sides! this one is the *best* yet! ...
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Our company's website has a section for press releases that's automatically updated. On January 2, 2000, it proudly presented the following:
29.12.99 (...some headline...)
29.12.99 (...some headline...)
30.12.99 (...some headline...)
02.01.100 Success! No Y2K bugs!
[ January 13, 2003: Message edited by: Calum ]
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i remember about a year ago i got very pissed at my computer and typed "stupid computer" into google. I found Computer Stupidities. I fucking love that site. i think i spent a good 5(?) hours rumaging through it, cracking up at people. Seriousely now, a cup holder on the front of the case?? formating a disc by ripping the metal off, and stripping the plastic. or shaving the sides off of a cd so it would fit into the floppy drive. Too funny.
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I was calling to sign up with a new DSL provider. When the guy asked what operating system I was using, I said, "Linux." I was put on hold for five minutes, and then a supervisor came back and told me, "You can't use Linux to connect to the Internet. It's a hacker tool, anyway." I almost fell out of my chair.
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Oh..my GOD! I think it should be mandatory for people to have some form of basic computer training before they can even touch one! I think it should be against the law for ANYONE without basic computer knowledge to touch, use, or even look at a computer. Smae rule applies for cars.
(then again, without stupid people, I wouldn't be laughing right now! :D )
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Yeah, some people need to know what the fuck they're doing b4 they mess around and fuck something up, and then the IT dept. fucks up, and business as we know it is screwed.
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quote:
Originally posted by SAJChurchey:
Yeah, some people need to know what the fuck they're doing b4 they mess around and fuck something up, and then the IT dept. fucks up, and business as we know it is screwed.
wouldn't happen with *NIX. normal users CAN'T fuck up the system on a properly configured *nix system...
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One of my main points exactly.
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quote:
Originally posted by Solo:
the it directors at my school seem to think that linux is a toy os. when i asked them about putting linux on 1 or 2 pcs in each lab they wer e like 'you can play around and have fun with linux etc at home'. ok now i told them very seriously that they need to re-evaluate their definitions of serious os's and toy os's. then i started walking away and thought about it again, and soon i needed oxygen i was laughing so hard
If Linux is a Toy OS then what is Windows?
A joke.
=P
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Here is another link to stupid IT people. Click on "Tales from the techs":
http://www.techtales.com/techroom.html (http://www.techtales.com/techroom.html)