Stop Microsoft
Miscellaneous => The Lounge => Topic started by: Master of Reality on 3 May 2002, 05:12
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check this out:
http://www.lotekk.net/index.php?page=fun&sub=text&show=hacker_son.txt
i got it from the forums at linuxquestions.org
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He sounds like the typical conservative man who doesn
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The more I read it, the more I wonder: Is this guy for real!? Is he joking or is he this dumb? Maybe both.
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I am sure that he is joking... but still, i believe that if i met him, i would take great pleasure in bitch slapping him (http://smile.gif)
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maybe he works for microsoft ;)
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It must be true, Bill Gates wrote it.
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um
agh! -=shoots self=-
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come on, it's obviously a joke. If he's so responsible, to the point where he censors all the music. habits and activities of his children and thinks these are the actions of a moral parent then why does that page have these images on it?:
(http://orsm.net/ads/ama_ads014.jpg)
and
(http://orsm.net/ads/ama_ads035.jpg)
(links not active in case zombie435674567435 or gooseberry clock feel like clicking...
quote:
2. Are you finding programs on your computer that you don't remember installing?
Your son will probably try to install some hacker software. He may attempt to conceal the presence of the software in some way, but you can usually find any new programs by reading through the programs listed under "Install/Remove Programs" in your control panel. Popular hacker software includes "Comet Cursor", "Bonzi Buddy" and "Flash".
This was the clincher for me. There is no way this is not a joke. Personally i would think that the only people who would have Bonzi Buddy would be the very AOL morons that this fictional father wants all kids to be. quote:
Your son may try to install "lunix" on your hard drive. If he is careful, you may not notice its presence, however, lunix is a capricious beast, and if handled incorrectly, your son may damage your computer, and even break it completely by deleting
Windows, at which point you will have to have your computer repaired by a Professional.
If you see the word "LILO" during your windows startup (just after you turn the machine on), your son has installed lunix. In order to get rid of it, you will have to send your computer back to the manufacturer, and have them fit a new hard drive.
Lunix is extremely dangerous software, and cannot be removed without destroying part of your hard disk surface.
It starts off ridiculous and ends up totally bizarre! The sad thing is, that they have tried to be as obvious about the parody as possible but i bet thousands of morons will actually believe this shit!
Did you notice that the title bar of this page reads "Cut me off at the knees and call me tripod" ?
[ May 03, 2002: Message edited by: Calum ]
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here's what all those REAL "moral majority" types are getting up to
quote:
Big Brother will hide on your computer and secretly record all instant messages, chat, email, web sites and more! Once you install it, it becomes completely invisible. Then, after the computer is used, you just enter a secret key-sequence, and you can see everything that happened!
Big Brother Can Record:
AOL Instant Messenger
MSN Messenger
All web sites visited
All keystrokes typed
Web based email
Compuserve
AOL mail, version 5, 6 and 7
Big Brother will NOT show up anywhere in the START menu, there will be no icons for it, and it won't even show up in the CTRL-ALT-DELETE menu. Only you can access it with a special key sequence/password.
This arrived to me in a spam email at work under the laughable heading "Protect Your Children". Pathetic.
[ May 03, 2002: Message edited by: Mulac Muloo ]
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BONZIBUddy and Comet Cursor are spyware (something MacOS and Linux users don't have, and they should be very thankfull for is too)
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quote:
If your son has undergone a sudden change in his style of dress, you may have a hacker on your hands. Hackers tend to address in bright, day-glo colors. They may wear baggy pants, bright colored shirts and spiky hair dyed in bright colors to match their clothes. They may take to carrying "glow-sticks" and some wear pacifiers around their necks. (I have no idea why they do this) There are many such hackers in schools today, and your son may have started to associate with them. If you notice that your son's group of friends includes people dressed like this, it is time to think about a severe curfew, to protect him from dangerous influences.
HAHAHAHAAHHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!
Anayone ever seen that stupid movie "Hackers"? God that film was more inacurate than my grandma's ass. This was basically the description they were following.
I thought it would have been more interesting of a movie if they did just show a bunch of out of shape nerdy kids sitting around yammering about open ports, and proxies.
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Just like Swordfish... a hacker with a girlfriend yeah right...
They only movie that is accurate about hackers is still Wargames...
It's about a 16 year old boy trying to obtain the latest games from a BBS service and excedently hacks NORAD
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I love that movies :D
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HAHAHAHAHAHA funniest thing i ever read, i almost died of laughter, telnet, bonzi, lunix, HAHAHAHAHAHAHA nice to get a good laugh
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Oh my god... then it seem's that Linux to this parent must be hacker paridise.
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I think my dad wrote that, that is me, that is my biography...
Everything from QUAKE to the BRIGHT CLOTHES
and the HAIR. (LOL) Except i use LINUX not LUNIX
The dud gave the joke away at:
quote:
invented by a Soviet computer hacker named Linyos Torovoltos, before the Russians lost the Cold War. It is based on a program called "xenix", which was written by Microsoft for the US government. These programs are used by hackers to break into other people's computer systems to steal credit card numbers. They may also be used to break into people's stereos to steal their music, using the "mp3" program. Torovoltos is a notorious hacker, responsible for writing many hacker programs, such as "telnet", which is used by hackers to connect to machines on the internet without using a telephone.
Your son may try to install "lunix" on your hard drive. If he is careful, you may not notice its presence, however, lunix is a capricious beast, and if handled incorrectly, your son may damage your computer, and even break it completely by deleting
Windows, at which point you will have to have your computer repaired by a Professional.
WATCH OUT GOOSENBURY YOUR DADDY MAY CATCH YOU USING FLASH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Sarcasm)
Anyway, i might go reboot back into windows now,
and leave my operating system made by a ex-soviet
(/Sarcasm)
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wow! you are joking re: yr dad, aren't you? that's a bit of a shame!
quote:
originally posted by psyjax:
Anayone ever seen that stupid movie "Hackers"? God that film was more inacurate than my grandma's ass.
Are you serious? how can your grandma's ass be 'inaccurate'? at the risk of sounding insensitive, does she have problems aiming when sitting down? quote:
originally posted by Refalm:
Just like Swordfish... a hacker with a girlfriend yeah right...
i laughed and laughed about the hacker component in that film, still, suspicious that they included a guy called "Torvalds" in it, who gets shot, is that legal?
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They only movie that is accurate about hackers is still Wargames...
It's about a 16 year old boy trying to obtain the latest games from a BBS service and excedently hacks NORAD
oh yes, that's accurate, happens all the time... you are right though, it's a fantastic film.
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Hmmm i got a haircut last night so the "Blond Tips" are no longer there. But yes, i dress like... like... ahhhhh....
THIS DUDE (http://www.alig.com/)
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Oh and:
http://adequacy.org/?op=displaystory;sid=2001/12/2/42056/2147 (http://adequacy.org/?op=displaystory;sid=2001/12/2/42056/2147)
the original
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x11, thanks for posting that link! it is incredible to see how many people took this rubbish seriously!!!
anyway, here is my favourite reply to the "is your son a hacker" post: quote:
i have been so blind! (4.25 / 4) (#1307)
by Anonymous Reader on Wed Dec 5th, 2001 at 06:52:13 PM PST
thank you so much for your insite into Hacking!
I myself have 3 kids all of which use all of the above programs and have all read those books! as soon as i read this article i called the cops and had them arrested! they had accumulated a vast quantity of .mp3 hacks and just a month ago we changed from AOL to a company providing Cable.. as they said that the webpages were loading slowly... but now i see it all clearly.. i was deceaved by my own kids! this is outragous! i went through their web history and found noumarous sites afiliated with hacking EG: "http://www.macromedia.com/software/flash/" i asume this is where they got it from... i also did a little reserch! and found out that Dos runs with a command called "command.com" i advise that if you do now want your clildren running this Dos hack to click "Start" -=> "find" -=> "files or folders" and enter "command.com" and then search for them.. deleting any on these files that you can find! a commen place for it to b hiding is c:\ and also c:\windows
i urge you to do this with most heist! to make the world a much Hacker free place to be!
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Yes i like the DOS attack bit, how he thinks it means accsessing another computers "Command Prompt"
But hilarious!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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http://adequacy.org/?op=displaystory;sid=2002/4/22/221427/313 (http://adequacy.org/?op=displaystory;sid=2002/4/22/221427/313)
http://adequacy.org/?op=displaystory;sid=2002/4/19/72923/2101 (http://adequacy.org/?op=displaystory;sid=2002/4/19/72923/2101)
Ba ahaha
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That whole website is full of utter shit.
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i thought this was intresting, here's a link that works
http://www.rajuabju.com/warezirc/childahacker.htm (http://www.rajuabju.com/warezirc/childahacker.htm)
by the way, dont piss me off. i might hack you with comet cursor.
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quote:
Oh yea, for everyone out there who is an idiot, this is all just a JOKE (http://smile.gif)
Good. :rolleyes:
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It may be a joke, but unfortunately it's quite realistic, knowing some parents.
There's nothing worse than a ignorant AND conservative parent.
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quote:
Originally posted by Master of Reality:
check this out:
http://orsm.net/text/adequacy.html (http://orsm.net/text/adequacy.html)
i got it from the forums at linuxquestions.org
you need to change the link to .php